Wednesday, August 21, 2013
Girl Friends: Making Time
In talking with a few people about friendship struggles, I have found that the biggest obstacle is TIME.
First off, I'd like to say that if you don't seem to have enough time for your girlfriends because there are other things, such as God and your husband and children that get most of your time, that's not a bad thing! Your priorities are in order :)
But, I do know that we desire time with other women. And I feel strongly that it is very important for us to have that time. We need friends we can share with (whether it's laughing or crying), friends to pray with, to get advice from, and for accountability.
And, ultimately, these things can enhance our relationship with God and with our spouse and children. Good for us, good for them! I thoroughly believe it makes us better women. Learning, growing, being held accountable.
So, if we have been working diligently on our relationships with God and our husbands, then by all means, a little girl time is in order!
I know that as we get older, it seems to be harder to make new friends. It's easy to look at other friendships and compare which does absolutely no good. We get in a rut, stuck wishing for more, better, friendships. I know- I've been there.
Thoughts such as "I wish I had a girlfriend I could curl up on the couch and watch a movie with" or "I wish I had a girlfriend I could go shopping with" or "I wish hubby and I had a set once a month dinner with another couple" can trap us. I apologize in advance to my friends but to be perfectly honest, I even find myself having an occasional pity party, thinking "I don't have any friends." And that's a load of crap. They're there, I just need to make time for them.
Instead of wasting time on these thoughts we need to start looking at the friendships we do have- even if it is only one- and focus on how we can make time for that person and how we can better that friendship. Who knows, maybe one of my friends is sitting at home having the same pity party when really, all one of us has to do is make a call or send a text or get on Facebook and take the initiative.
Now, back to the main obstacle that many of us run into with our friendships- time. I am a firm believer that if something is important to us, we will MAKE time for it. Schedule it in, just like you do work or church or the other very important things in your life. (It also works GREAT for exercising! I most definitely schedule my workout time and it gets done!)
My friendships are important to me and sometimes I may feel like I just want to hang out at home with my family but it's been way too long since I've seen my girlfriend so I will schedule that time. And sometimes, to be honest, it is hard for me to get motivated to GO and DO it but once I do, I never regret it. I never think dang, I wish I wouldn't have done that! (Again, same goes for working out!)
If you've made it this far, I thank you for reading and I hope it's given you something to think on. Just remember: God and husband first. Then, instead of looking for newer, better friendships, look at what you already have and figure out how you can make that better and make time to do that.
Lets help each other: share in the comments below how you are going to improve your friendships.
For me, I'm going to start taking the initiative more because my friends ARE important to me.